SCP-4005 - The Holy and Heavenly City of Fabled China
“There's a better world out there, Martha!”
SCP-146 - Bronze Head of Shame
"Stop. Take it back. Don't. I won't do it again. I'm sorry. I don't want to. Not again. Stop… Please…"
SCP-136 - Naked Doll
"This thing is killing people. We haven’t learned anything new from it in ten years, and we can’t use it."
SCP-4910 - “The Grinner”
Artistic representation varies wildly, yet focuses exclusively on various amalgamations of teeth and the associated gingiva.
SCP-OO1-J - KEEP CALM AND APOLLYON
This site has been destroyed by SCP-OO1-J, ergo, I can enjoy Petula Clark as much as I damn well please and only corpses will judge me.
SCP-099 - The Portrait
A reproduction of the work currently hangs in the Museum of Modern Art in New York, with critical elements removed to prevent the paranoia trigger.
SCP-020-J - A Pale Comparison
SCP-020-J was discovered outside Site-30's 5th-floor janitor closet alongside the corpses of Janitor Worth, five site guards, D-1221, and Dr. Cimmerian.
SCP-096 - The “Shy Guy”
“Let this be on record that I am formally requesting SCP-096 be terminated as soon as possible.”
SCP-018-J - Normal Trench Coat Worn By An Adult
… As expected, the D-Class personnel were distracted from their escape by the prospect of viewing an R-rated movie.
SCP-091 - Nostalgia
“Assistant Researcher ████ — while viewing a recording of her wedding from 199█ — noted SCP-091 in the background of the film and noted a strong flood of nostalgic memories attached to it…”
![SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ec85e2d4c483c5e7cb97193/1677121541297-LFWH50V3ICXE2H2BQYCO/Joke+Series+%28website%29+%282023+update%29.png)
SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]
“There is a current and present emergency, and I am about to describe it. Please listen carefully, as this will contain important information.”
SCP-078 - Guilt
…Any task the subject performs more trivial than the basics of survival will induce a bout of neurosis as the subject attempts to rationalize why they did not instead take some other action.
SCP-077 - Rot Skull
All biological material… which comes in contact with SCP-077-1 is instantly transformed into a viscous, malodorous ooze… identified as the rotted flesh of potato tubers…
SCP-004-J - Stan from Accounting
SCP-106 appeared rapt with attention, materialized a business card and agreed to join SCP-004-J for a "lunch and learn" at his soonest convenience.
SCP-053 - Young Girl
No physical contact is to be made with SCP-053 without full atmosphere-containment suit and eye shield. No eye contact is to be made with SCP-053 for any reason.
SCP-035 - Possessive Mask
SCP-035 has proven to be highly sadistic, prompting some to commit suicide and transforming others into near-mindless servants with linguistic persuasion alone.
SCP-031 - What is Love?
A subject directly perceiving SCP-031 will see it as an individual the subject knew and had a romantic attraction to at some point in their past.
SCP-023 - Black Shuck
In an attempt to curtail the danger posed by SCP-023, Dr. ████████ has approved the removal of both 023's eyes and teeth.